“Watch out! You nearly broad sided that car!,” my father yelled at me. “Can’t you do anything right?”
Those words hurt worse than blows. I turned my head toward the
elderly man in the seat beside me, daring me to challenge him. A lump
rose in my throat as I averted my eyes. I wasn’t prepared for another
battle.
“I saw the car, Dad. Please don’t yell at me when I’m driving.” My
voice was measured and steady, sounding far calmer than I really felt.
Dad glared at me, then turned away and settled back. At home I left
Dad in front of the television and went outside to collect my thoughts.
Dark, heavy clouds hung in the air with a promise of rain. The rumble of
distant thunder seemed to echo my inner turmoil. What could I do about
him?
Dad had been a lumberjack in Washington and Oregon. He had enjoyed
being outdoors and had reveled in pitting his strength against the
forces of nature. He had entered grueling lumberjack competitions, and
had placed often. The shelves in his house were filled with trophies
that attested to his physical prowess.
But the years marched on relentlessly. The first time he couldn’t
lift a heavy log, he joked about it. Later that same day I saw him
outside alone, straining to lift it. He became irritable whenever anyone
teased him about his advancing age, or when he couldn’t do something he
had done as a younger man.
Four days after his 67th birthday, he had a heart attack. An
ambulance sped him to the hospital while a paramedic administered CPR to
keep blood and oxygen flowing.
At the hospital, Dad was rushed into an operating room. He was lucky:
he survived. But something inside Dad died. His zest for life was gone.
He obstinately refused to follow doctor’s orders. Suggestions and
offers of help were turned aside with sarcasm and insults. The number of
visitors thinned, then finally stopped altogether. Dad was left alone.
My wife, Maria, and I asked Dad to come live with us on our small
farm. We hoped the fresh air and rustic atmosphere would help him
adjust.
Within a week after he moved in, I regretted the invitation. It
seemed nothing was satisfactory. He criticized everything I did. I
became frustrated and moody. Soon I was taking my pent-up anger out on
Maria. We began to bicker and argue.
Alarmed, Maria sought out our pastor and explained the situation. The
clergyman set up weekly counseling appointments for us. At the close of
each session he prayed, asking God to soothe Dad’s troubled mind.
But the months wore on and God was silent. Something had to be done and it was up to me to do it.
The next day I sat down with the phone book and methodically called
each of the mental health clinics listed in the Yellow Pages. I
explained my problem to each of the sympathetic voices that answered, in
vain.
Just when I was giving up hope, one of the voices suddenly exclaimed,
“I just read something that might help you! Let me go get the article.”
I listened as she read. The article described a remarkable study done
at a nursing home. All of the patients were under treatment for chronic
depression. Yet their attitudes had improved dramatically when they
were given responsibility for a dog.
I drove to the animal shelter that afternoon. After I filled out a
questionnaire, a uniformed officer led me to the kennels. The odor of
disinfectant stung my nostrils as I moved down the row of pens. Each
contained five to seven dogs. Long-haired dogs, curly-haired dogs, black
dogs, spotted dogs all jumped up, trying to reach me. I studied each
one but rejected one after the other for various reasons too big, too
small, too much hair.
As I neared the last pen a dog in the shadows of the far corner
struggled to his feet, walked to the front of the run and sat down. It
was a pointer, one of the dog world’s aristocrats. But this was a
caricature of the breed.
Years had etched his face and muzzle with shades of gray. His hip
bones jutted out in lopsided triangles. But it was his eyes that caught
and held my attention. Calm and clear, they beheld me unwaveringly.
I pointed to the dog. “Can you tell me about him?”
The officer looked, then shook his head in puzzlement. “He’s a funny
one. Appeared out of nowhere and sat in front of the gate. We brought
him in, figuring someone would be right down to claim him. That was two
weeks ago and we’ve heard nothing. His time is up tomorrow.” He gestured helplessly.
As the words sank in I turned to the man in horror. “You mean you’re going to kill him?”
“Sir,” he said gently, “that’s our policy. We don’t have room for every unclaimed dog.”
I looked at the pointer again. The calm brown eyes awaited my decision. “I’ll take him,” I said.
I drove home with the dog on the front seat beside me. When I reached
the house I honked the horn twice. I was helping my prize out of the
car when Dad shuffled onto the front porch.
“Ta-da! Look what I got for you, Dad!” I said excitedly.
Dad looked, then wrinkled his face in disgust. “If I had wanted a dog
I would have gotten one. And I would have picked out a better specimen
than that bag of bones. Keep it! I don’t want it,” Dad waved his arm
scornfully and turned back toward the house.
Anger rose inside me. It squeezed together my throat muscles and
pounded into my temples. “You’d better get used to him, Dad. He’s
staying!”
Dad ignored me.
“Did you hear me, Dad?” I screamed.
At those words Dad whirled angrily, his hands clenched at his sides,
his eyes narrowed and blazing with hate. We stood glaring at each other
like duelists, when suddenly the pointer pulled free from my grasp. He
wobbled toward my dad and sat down in front of him. Then slowly,
carefully, he raised his paw.
Dad’s lower jaw trembled as he stared at the uplifted paw. Confusion
replaced the anger in his eyes. The pointer waited patiently. Then Dad
was on his knees hugging the animal.
It was the beginning of a warm and intimate friendship. Dad named the
pointer Cheyenne. Together he and Cheyenne explored the community. They
spent long hours walking down dusty lanes. They spent reflective
moments on the banks of streams, angling for tasty trout. They even
started to attend Sunday services together, Dad sitting in a pew and Cheyenne lying quietly at his feet.
Dad and Cheyenne were inseparable throughout the next three years.
Dad’s bitterness faded, and he and Cheyenne made many friends. Then late
one night I was startled to feel Cheyenne ‘s cold nose burrowing
through our bed covers. He had never before come into our bedroom at
night. I woke Maria, put on my robe and ran into my father’s room. Dad
lay in his bed, his face serene. But his spirit had left quietly
sometime during the night.
Two days later my shock and grief deepened when I discovered Cheyenne
lying dead beside Dad’s bed. I wrapped his still form in the rag rug he
had slept on. As I buried him near a favorite fishing hole, I silently
thanked the dog for the help he had given me in restoring Dad’s peace of
mind.
The morning of Dad’s funeral dawned overcast and dreary. “This day
looks like the way I feel,” I thought, as I walked down the aisle to the
pews reserved for family. I was surprised to see the many friends Dad
and Cheyenne had made filling the church. The pastor began his eulogy.
It was a tribute to both Dad and the dog who had changed his life.
And then the pastor turned to Hebrews 13:2. “Do not neglect to show
hospitality to strangers, for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it.”
At that, the past dropped into place, completing a puzzle that I had not
seen before — Cheyenne’s unexpected appearance at the animal shelter;
his calm acceptance and complete devotion to my father; and the
proximity of their deaths.
And suddenly I understood.
God had answered my prayers after all. But in His time, not ours . . . .
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment