Thursday, February 23, 2017

I USED TO BE A REGULAR GUY

I used think I was just a regular guy, but . . ..
I was born white, which now, whether I like it or not, makes me a racist.
I am a fiscal and moral conservative, which by today's standards, makes me a fascist.
I am heterosexual, which according tgay folks, now makes me a homophobic.
I am non-union, which makes me a traitor tthe working class and an ally of big business.
I am a Christian, which now labels me as an infidel.
I believe in the 2nd Amendment, which now makes me a member of the vast gun lobby.
I am older than 65, which makes me a useless old man.
I think and I reason, therefore I doubt much that the main stream media tells me, which must make me a reactionary.
I am proud of my heritage and our inclusive American culture, which makes me a xenophobe.
I value my safety and that of my family and I appreciate the police and the legal system, which makes me a right-wing extremist.
I believe in hard work, fair play, and fair compensation according teach individual's merits, which today makes me an anti-socialist.
I believe in the defense and protection of the homeland for and by all citizens, which now makes me a militant.
Now, a sick old woman is calling me and my friends a basket of deplorable.
Please help me come tterms with the new me because I'm just not sure whI am anymore!
I would like tthank all my friends for sticking with me through these abrupt, new found changes in my life and my thinking!
I just can't imagine or understand what's happened tme squickly!
Funny . . . it's all just taken place over the last 7 or 8 years!
As if all this stuff wasn't enough tdeal with, I'm now afraid tginteither restroom!
It is just hard twin against the liberals. Ha-ha!


Tuesday, February 21, 2017

WHAT WE HAVE HERE IS A FAILURE TO COMMUNICATE!


 A judge was interviewing a Georgia woman regarding her pending divorce and asks, "What are the grounds for your divorce?"
"About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by."
"No," he said, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?" 
"It is made of concrete, brick, and mortar," she responded. 
"I mean," he continued, "what are your relations like?" 
"I have an aunt and uncle and 12 cousins living here in town, as well as my husband's parents."  
The judge took a deep breath and asked,
"Do you have a real grudge?" 
"No, we have a two-car carport and have never really needed one cuz we don't have a car."  
"Please," he tried again, "is there any infidelity in your marriage?" 
"Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music - all that hip hop and rap trap -but we can't seem to do anything about it."  
"Ma'am, does your husband ever beat you up?" 
"Yes, he gets up every morning before I do and makes the coffee." 
The judge asked, "Is your husband a nagger?"  
"Oh, hell no, he's as white as you and me!" 
Finally, in frustration, the judge asked,
"Lady, why in hell do you want a divorce? 
"Oh, I don't want a divorce," she replied. "I've never wanted a divorce, my husband does.
The damn fool says he can't communicate with me."

Saturday, February 18, 2017

PING IS PROUD TO BE INVOLVED

FORWARDED BY A FRIEND:

Even if you're not a golfer this is interesting.

This isn't a joke or cartoon; just something interesting to know..........Please forward this on to others......

On Monday, I played the Disney, Lake Buena Vista course. As usual the starters matched me with three other players. After a few holes we began to get to know each other a bit.

One fellow was rather young and had his wife riding along in the golf cart with him. I noticed that his golf bag had his name on it and after closer inspection it also said "wounded war veterans ".

When I had my first chance to chat with him I asked him about the bag. His response was simply that it was a gift. I then asked if he was wounded and he said yes.

When I asked more about his injury, his response was

"I'd rather not talk about it, sir".

Over a few holes I learned that he had spent the last 15 months in an army rehabilitation hospital in San Antonio , Texas . His wife moved there to be with him and he was released from the hospital in September.

He was a rather quiet fellow; however, he did say that he wanted to get good at golf.

We had a nice round and as we became a bit more familiar I asked him about the brand new set of Ping woods and irons he was playing. Some looked like they had never been hit. His response was simple.

He said that this round was the first full round he had played with these clubs. Later in the round he told me the following.

As part of the discharge process from the rehabilitation hospital, Ping comes in and provides three days of golf instruction, followed by club fitting.

Upon discharge from the hospital, Ping gives each of the discharged veterans, generally about 40 soldiers, a brand new set of custom fitted clubs along with the impressive golf bags.

The fellow I met was named Ben Woods and he looked me in the eye and said that being fitted for those clubs was one of the best things that ever happened to him and he was determined to learn to play golf well enough to deserve the gift Ping had given him.

Ben is now out of the service medically discharged just a month ago. He is as fine a young man as you would ever want to meet.

Ping , whose products are made with pride here in America ( Arizona ), has the good judgment not to advertise this program.

God Bless America and the game of golf.

Thank you PING

May God Bless our Military!

FYI:I checked and this is true! PING is proud to be involved with the Wounded Warriors Sports Project. The Project is currently partnering with PGA of America to offer golf lessons at five of the major military medical centers in the U.S. The format involves running an eight week long course where Warriors receive instruction from PGA professionals that have been trained in adaptive teaching techniques. Those wounded warriors who attend at least six of the training sessions and have a permanent severe disability receive a full bag of custom-fit and custom-built PING golf clubs. If you would like additional information on the Wounded Warrior Sports Project, please feel free to contact that organization at (904) 296-7350 or visit www.woundedwarriorproject.org.


This one deserves to be shared with everybody!

Monday, February 13, 2017

LATEST NEWS FROM THE WAR IN CHIRAQ

From MyFoxChicagoAn 11-year-old girl was shot in the head Saturday night in the Parkway Gardens neighborhood on the South Side.
The girl was sitting in the rear seat of a vehicle about 7:40 p.m. in the 6500 block of South King Drive when gunfire was heard and she was discovered with a gunshot wound to her head, Chicago Police said. She was taken to Comer Children’s Hospital in critical condition, police said. No one was in custody as Area Central detectives investigate.
Also Saturday night, a 12-year-old girl was shot and critically wounded in West Englewood. She was playing with friends about 7:15 p.m. outside in the 1900 block of West 57th Street when gunfire erupted and she was shot in the head, according to Chicago Police.
The girl, who was not thought to be the intended target of the shooting, was taken in critical condition to Stroger Hospital. Police initially said the victim was a woman, between 35 and 40 years old. No one was in custody as Area South detectives investigate.



The girls were among 18 shot in Chicago over the weekend, including three fatally. During the second weekend of February 2016, which was Presidents Day weekend, six people were killed and 19 wounded in shootings.

WHOLE LOTTA DEMOCRATS KILLING DEMOCRATS!
So far in 2017, 313 people have been shot in Chicago, according to Sun-Times records. At least ten of the victims have been children under the age of 14.

Friday, February 10, 2017

GOOD ADVISE FOR ANYONE!

A Cowboy's Guide to Life which is very perceptive!
• Your fences need to be horse high, pig tight and bull strong.
• Life ain't about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.
• Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.
• Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
• A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.
• Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.
• Meanness don't jest happen overnight.
• Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.
• Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.
• It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
• You cannot unsay a cruel word.
• Every path has a few puddles.
• When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
• The best sermons are lived, not preached.
• Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway
• Don't judge folks by their relatives.
• Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
• Live a good, honorable life. Then when you
• If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
• It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
• Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.
• The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with watches you shave his face in he mirror every mornin'.
• If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around
• Always drink upstream from the herd.
• Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.
• Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

DAMN! BURN!!

A family in Galveston, TX wrote an obituary that was memorable to say the least. The following was posted on the Carnes Funeral Home website. 
Leslie Ray Charping
Nov 20, 1942 - Jan 30, 2017
Leslie Ray "Popeye" Charping was born in Galveston on November 20, 1942 and passed away January 30, 2017, which was 29 years longer than expected and much longer than he deserved. Leslie battled with cancer in his latter years and lost his battle, ultimately due to being the horses *** he was known for. He leaves behind 2 relieved children; a son and daughter, along with six grandchildren and countless other victims including an ex wife, relatives, friends, neighbors, doctors, nurses and random strangers.
At a young age, Leslie quickly became a model example of bad parenting combined with mental illness and a complete commitment to drinking, drugs, womanizing and being generally offensive. Leslie enlisted to serve in the Navy, but not so much in a brave & patriotic way but more as part of a plea deal to escape sentencing on criminal charges. While enlisted, Leslie was the Navy boxing champion and went on to sufficiently embarrass his family and country by spending the remainder of his service in the Balboa Mental Health Hospital receiving much needed mental healthcare services.
Leslie was surprisingly intelligent, however he lacked ambition and motivation to do anything more than being reckless, wasteful, squandering the family savings and fantasizing about get rich quick schemes. Leslie's hobbies included being abusive to his family, expediting trips to heaven for the beloved family pets and fishing, which he was less skilled with than the previously mentioned. Leslie's life served no other obvious purpose, he did not contribute to society or serve his community and he possessed no redeeming qualities besides quick whited sarcasm which was amusing during his sober days.
With Leslie's passing he will be missed only for what he never did; being a loving husband, father and good friend. No services will be held, there will be no prayers for eternal peace and no apologizes to the family he tortured. Leslie's remains will be cremated and kept in the barn until "Ray", the family donkey's wood shavings run out. Leslie's passing proves that evil does in fact die and hopefully marks a time of healing and safety for all.

HANDS

THE STORY BEHIND THE PICTURE OF THE PRAYING HANDS

Back in the fifteenth century, in a tiny village near Nuremberg, lived a family with eighteen children.  Eighteen!  In order merely to keep food on the table for this mob, the father and head of the household, a goldsmith by profession, worked almost eighteen hours a day at his trade and any other paying chore he could find in the neighborhood.
Despite their seemingly hopeless condition, two of the elder children, Albrecht and Albert, had a dream.  They both wanted to pursue their talent for art, but they knew full well that their father would never be financially able to send either of them to Nuremberg to study at the Academy.
After many long discussions at night in their crowded bed, the two boys finally worked out a pact.  They would toss a coin.  The loser would go down into the nearby mines and, with his earnings, support his brother while he attended the academy.  Then, when that brother who won the toss completed his studies, in four years, he would support the other brother
at the academy, either with sales of his artwork or, if necessary, also by laboring in the mines.
They tossed a coin on a Sunday morning after church.  Albrecht Durer won the toss and went off to Nuremberg.
Albert went down into the dangerous mines and, for the next four years, financed his brother, whose work at the academy was almost an immediate sensation.   Albrecht's etchings, his woodcuts, and his oils were far better than those of most of his professors, and by the time he graduated, he was beginning to earn considerable fees for his commissioned works.
When the young artist returned to his village, the Durer family held a festive dinner on their lawn to celebrate Albrecht's triumphant homecoming.   After a long and memorable meal, punctuated with music and laughter, Albrecht rose from his honored position at the head of the table to drink a toast to his beloved brother for the years of sacrifice that had enabled Albrecht to fulfill his ambition.   His closing words were, "And now, Albert, blessed brother of mine, now it is your turn.   Now you can go to Nuremberg to pursue your dream, and I will take care of you."
All heads turned in eager expectation to the far end of the table where Albert sat, tears streaming down his pale face, shaking his lowered head from side to side while he sobbed and repeated, over and over, "No ...no....no ..no."  Finally, Albert rose and wiped the tears from his cheeks.   He glanced down the long table at the faces he loved, and then, holding his hands close to his right cheek, he said softly, "No, brother.  I cannot go to Nuremberg. 
It is too late for me.  Look ... look what four years in the mines have done to my hands! 
The bones in every finger have been smashed at least once, and lately I have been suffering from arthritis so badly in my right hand that I cannot even hold a glass to return your toast, much less make delicate lines on parchment or canvas with a pen or a brush. 
No, brother ....for me it is too late."
More than 450 years have passed.  By now, Albrecht Durer's hundreds of masterful portraits, pen and silver-point sketches, water colors, charcoals, woodcuts, and copper engravings hang in every great museum in the world, but the odds are great that you, like most people, are familiar with only one of Albrecht Durer's works.   More than merely being familiar with it, you very well may have a reproduction hanging in your home or office.
One day, to pay homage to Albert for all that he had sacrificed, Albrecht Durer painstakingly drew his brother's abused hands with palms together and thin fingers stretched skyward. 
He called his powerful drawing simply "Hands," but the entire world almost immediately opened their hearts to his great masterpiece and renamed his tribute of love "The Praying Hands."

The next time you see a copy of that touching creation, take a second look.
Let it be your reminder, that no one - no one - ever makes it alone!
 
  

ADOPT A TERRORIST PROGRAM

A Canadian female liberal wrote a lot of letters to the Canadian government, complaining about the treatment of captive insurgents (terrorists) being held in Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities. She demanded a response to her letter.   She received back the following reply:

National Defence Headquarters
M Gen George R. Pearkes Bldg., 15 NT
101 Colonel By Drive
Ottawa , ON K1A 0K2
Canada

Dear Concerned Citizen,

Thank you for your recent letter expressing your profound concern of
 treatment of the Taliban and Al Qaeda terrorists captured by Canadian Forces, who were subsequently transferred to the Afghanistan Government and are currently being held by Afghan officials in Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities.  Our administration takes these matters seriously and your opinions were heard loud and clear here in Ottawa. You will be pleased to learn, thanks to the concerns of citizens like yourself, we are creating a new department here at the Department of National Defence, to be called 'Liberals Accept Responsibility for Killers' program, or L.A.R.K. for short.  In accordance with the guidelines of this new program, we have decided, on a trial basis, to divert several terrorists and place them in homes of concerned citizens such as yourself, around the country, under those citizens personal care. Your personal detainee has been selected and is scheduled for transportation under heavily armed guard to your residence in Toronto next Monday. Ali Mohammed Ahmed bin Mahmud is your detainee, and is to be cared for pursuant to the standards you personally demanded in your letter of complaint. 

You will be pleased to know that we will conduct weekly inspections to ensure that your standards of care for Ahmed are commensurate with your recommendations. Although Ahmed is a sociopath and extremely violent, we hope that your sensitivity to what you described as his 'attitudinal problem' will help him overcome those character flaws. Perhaps you are correct in describing these problems as mere cultural differences. We understand that you plan to offer counselling and home schooling, however, we strongly recommend that you hire some assistant caretakers.  Please advise any Jewish  friends, neighbours or relatives about your house guest, as he might get agitated or even violent, but we are sure you can reason with him. He is also expert at making a wide variety of explosive devices from common household products, so you may wish to keep those items locked up, unless in your opinion, this might offend him. Your adopted terrorist is extremely proficient in hand-to-hand combat and can extinguish human life with such simple items as a pencil or nail clippers. We advise that you do not ask him to demonstrate these skills either in your home or wherever you choose to take him while helping him adjust to life in our country.   Ahmed will not wish to interact with you or your daughters except sexually, since he views females as a form of property, thereby having no rights, including refusal of his sexual demands. This is a particularly sensitive subject for him. You also should know that he has shown violent tendencies around women who fail to comply with the dress code that he will recommend as more appropriate attire. I'm sure you will come to enjoy the anonymity offered by the burka over time. Just remember that it is all part of respecting his culture and religious beliefs as described in your letter. You take good care of Ahmed and remember that we will try to have a counsellor available to help you over any difficulties you encounter while Ahmed is adjusting to Canadian culture.
Thanks again for your concern. We truly appreciate it when folks like you
 keep us informed of the proper way to do our job and care for our fellow man. 

Good luck and God bless you.

Cordially,
Gordon O'Connor
Minister of National Defence

Interesting read from a German born American

Interesting read from a German born American:
A popular talking point on the left is that Donald Trump has things in common with Hitler.
But is this the case? Independent Journal Review decided to speak to a woman born in Nazi Germany about the comparison.
We talked with Inga Andrews, who was born in Dusseldorf, Germany, during Hitler's reign. While most kids were playing with friends, Andrews was hiding in air raid shelters and helping to clean up the rubble from destroyed buildings to rebuild her city.
Inga Andrews said: "What is going on in this country is giving me chills. Trump is not like Hitler. Just because a leader wants order doesn't mean they're like a dictator.
What reminds me more of Hitler than anything else isn't Trump, it's the destruction of freedom of speech on the college campuses — the agendas fueled by the professors.
That's how Hitler started, he pulled in the youth to miseducate them, to brainwash them, it's happening today."
Andrews drove home her point further for the younger generation:
"It saddens me that we are teaching garbage in the schools and in the college. We don't teach history anymore. History repeats itself over and over.
The kids out there today haven't ever lived through a war like I did. I remember sitting in a rock pile, cleaning rocks, to rebuild Germany. I remember eating maple leaves and grass to survive."
She later made it to U.S. when her mother married an American, but her journey wasn't without hurdles.
"It took six years because she had worked in Germany. It took six years to clear her to be able to be married. Then when you married an American, because we were the enemy, you had to wait.
We had to go from Heidelberg to Bremerhaven where another camp was. This camp was run by the U.S. military. They vetted us in both places. There were all these German brides with their children and families who had to be vetted again for three of four days before they could get on the ship.
The ship we took was the S.S. Washington. We arrived in New York in 1953.
So we had a vetting process like what we are going through now because you have to have this to make the country safe."
Then Andrews had some choice words for the protesters in the streets destroying property: “America needs to grow up. The young people who are rioting and destroying property, who have no respect for elders and freedom of speech, I was so proud to become a citizen of this country.”
She opened up about how she accepted American culture and values: Inga Andrews continued on about her desire to become an American:
"At school, they put me in first grade even though I was a teenager because I didn't speak English. The teachers would take time at their lunch time to teach us how to speak English.
But they came to find out that I was hiding in the bathroom stall with my legs up eating my braunschweiger and onion sandwich, so nobody would talk to me.
Still, I had a burning desire to be an American. I went to night school to learn English. I would practice English without a German accent. I didn't want to be German. I wanted to be an American.
When I was fourteen, I was working in a drug store reading comic books. Through reading comic books, I developed my English skills.
We would go to the malls and we wouldn't speak our foreign language, we would speak English. Because we believed we needed to honor the country that opened its doors for us. It was rude to do otherwise."
Andrews returned to the present day with a message for those attacking freedom of speech: "Professors shouldn't be telling their students to go after freedom of speech. They should be telling them that this is the greatest country in the world.
The demonstrators can't tell you why they're demonstrating. I'm not a Republican. I'm not a Democrat. I just want the country to be at peace.
I see what is happening here reflecting some of the things we saw in Germany, and it's terrifying. It's sad. But it's not because of Trump. It's because of poor education.
Trump is not like Hitler. The theory that he is is propaganda. Yes, I lived through some of Nazi Germany, but all you have to do is read some books about that period to see how wrong that theory is."
She finished by sharing a personal story. “I had an aunt who was in the Olympics. My aunt got all this extra stuff from Hitler and was surrounded by this propaganda,” she said, before explaining how she couldn't keep a relationship with her aunt. “I couldn't have anything to do with her. Even after the war, she was calling the Jewish people, of whom I was friends with, 'dirty Jews.'”
“My point in saying all this is that if people aren't able to see outside of one world view, that's what happens,” Andrews concluded. “They buy the propaganda. And that's what is happening today. And if people aren't educated properly and given the ability to think freely — we will repeat that history.”