Saturday, December 31, 2011

WHAT QUESTION?

Doggy See, Doggy Do

video

Amos N Andy - In the IRS Office

TIZ THE SEASON!!!
By the way, the NAACP protested this great early TV show and caused it to be cancelled, causing all of these great actors to die penniless. None ever worked again. Shame on the NAACP!

Friday, December 30, 2011

!!KILLER WHALE VS GREAT WHITE SHARK!!

Orca vs sharks in New Zealand

A Southland family has witnessed a rare and spectacular display of animal prowess just metres from a popular fishing and swimming beach.

They are images that would send shivers down the spine of any keen beach goer this summer.

A group of sharks were being hunted by an orca just metres from Tuatapere Beach.

AWESOME PHOTOS


























And My Favorite........

I love Gods' sense of humor, too 

   


A smile from God!  One in a million shot 


Send God's smile to someone you want to bless today!  

25 Best Mom Confessions of 2011


It's been almost a year since I started the Confessional onScary Mommy. I've laughed, I've gagged, I've teared up, and I've dropped my jaw. With the year drawing to a close, I thought I would share the most popular confessions -- those with the most "likes" and "OMG me too's." Can you relate to any? Got anything to get off your chest before stepping into 2012?



1. Everyone thinks I'm such a great mom for teaching my daughter how to read already. It wasn't me. It was the LeapFrog pen. I had no idea she could read.

2. When I get grouchy, I send myself to my room. Kids bang on the door and I tell them I can't come out and they can't come in until the timer goes off because I'm in time-out. For extra punishment, I make myself eat candy.

3. One of my favorite moments of the day is taking off my bra when I get home.

4. I cheat at board games to make them end faster.

5. DH wouldn't climb up in the attic to get my Halloween decorations down, so I did it. After I got them down, I carefully laid myself out on the floor and screamed in pain. Now he is doing whatever I want.

6. I hang around in sweats all day. Then 10 minutes before DH gets home from work, I put on some sexy pair of jeans and a cute top. Some might think this is laziness -- I think it's genius.

7. To my beloved arrogant teenage sons: payback comes tonight for all the gross or frustrating things you do. Your preteen sister is having 15 friends over ... and I'm not forewarning you. Love, Mommy

8. If they ever make it possible to prove whose Facebook pages you've been cruising, I'll have a lot of explaining to do.

9. I stuck a hundred-dollar bill in my neighbor's mailbox yesterday because she just lost her job and I know she was already broke. DH would kill me if he found out -- we can't really afford it.

10. I have been forced to conclude that the reason kids have so much energy is because they siphon it out of their parents like midget gasoline thieves.

11. We had a new mattress and boxspring delivered, and when the delivery guys picked up the existing mattress to remove it, my "Blue Thunder" vibrator was under the mattress.

12. When I send thank-you notes to people I don't like, I dump an ass-load of glitter or confetti in the envelope just to passive-aggressively piss them off.

13. My DH just tweeted how awesome it's going to be to come home to a home-cooked meal today. I wonder where he's going, and if he'll bring me back a plate ...

14. My number one reason for not wanting to have a third baby is that I pee my pants pretty much every day since my second was born two years ago. At this rate, my kids will soon be more potty-trained than I am.

15. Had to go on a special diet for gestational diabetes. Husband decided to do it with me, which was nice. In three weeks, I've gained 4 pounds and he's lost 15. This is why we hate men.

16. I am drafting a document so pointless and boring (that I know no one is ever going to read) that I am tempted to insert dirty words at random just to see if anyone notices. Too bad that would get me fired. Penis.

17. I do the income taxes every year, and I lie to my husband about how much we get back. I keep over half for myself (sometimes more).

18. I'm sick and tired of sanctimonious cloth diaper-users. You're really going to think you're better than me because of where your kid happens to shit? Shit's shit, honey, no matter where it lands.

19. I pretend I'm Julia Child when I cook and vocalize everything I'm doing in a silly accent. Shut up, it's fun.

20. Sometimes if I find myself alone with one person in an elevator, I like to smile at them very happily until they notice and then say, "I've got new socks."

21. I have a designated plucker. If I'm ever in a coma, my plucker promises to pluck my chin, eyebrow, and mustache hair when she visits me in the hospital. I will for her if she is in a coma. Important stuff!

22. I misdialed a 800# at work and accidentally called a sex hotline. On speakerphone. In a conference room full of people. Awesome.

23. Sometimes I can't be bothered to speak to people, so I pretend to have not seen them.

24. I dyed my hair its original color. I then ran around town telling people I was happy that the carpet matched the drapes. I thought the carpet meant eyebrows.

25. DS flushed his fishy down the potty today. He cried and asked to call heaven so he knows fishy made it. Called my dad and he acted like God. Made DS feel sooo much better.

Dyson Super Vac

video

ELDER ENJOYMENT

Elder enjoyment
As we get older we sometimes begin to doubt our ability to
"make a difference" in the world. It is at these times that our
hopes are boosted by the remarkable achievements of other
"seniors" who have found the courage to take on challenges
that would make many of us wither.
Harold Schlumberg is such a person:
QUOTE FROM HAROLD:
"I've often been asked, 'What do you old folks do now that
you're retired?' Well, I'm fortunate to have a chemical engineering
background, and one of the things I enjoy most is converting beer,
wine and vodka into urine.
Then I piss on a photo of Obama.....
I do it every day and I really enjoy it."
Harold is an inspiration to us all.

What If the Beatles Were Irish?

What if the Beatles were Irish?

The Beatles are one of the most recognizable bands ever. These English lads had a defining influence on the 1960s and 70s. But what if their music had sounded Irish? This comedian gives a rousing medley of Beatles tunes with an Irish twist.

Ruins in Georgia mountains show evidence of Maya connection



















Thursday, December 29, 2011

MEGA FIGHTS OF 2011

Do You See The Trees?

Cheating Bitch Gotta GO!!

















NEW ENGINE SENDS SHOCK WAVES THROUGH AUTO INDUSTRY

The Wave Disk Generator uses 60 percent of its fuel for propulsion; standard car engines use just 15 percent. As a result, the generator is 3.5 times more fuel efficient than typical combustion engines.


Michigan State University associate professor of mechanical engineering Norbert Mueller describes his Wave Disk Generator, for which he has received a $2.5 million grant from the U.S. Department of Energy to build a prototype new engine and generator technology that can dramatically improve efficiencies and reduce costs of electric hybrid vehicles.

SOAP STARS PROTEST AGEISM




















NEW YEAR'S EVE DANCE With THE ARCHER BAND

This Saturday
DECEMBER 31ST
 8:00-12:30  $20 each
 
 
PLENTY OF TABLES WERE PLANNED
FOR WALK IN COUPLES & SINGLES ALSO
SO COME JOIN US
MANY TABLES ARE ALL SINGLES SO THERE WILL BE PLENTY
OF SINGLES TO DANCE WITH AS WELL AS  COUPLES  
$20 each
Anyone with a large party who would like to have a table put
ALL 'HOLD' TABLES WILL BE HELD UNTIL 8:00 pm
(When the Band starts the HOLD signs will be removed)
 
 
 
 
JAN
Tom
Greg
Kenny
Ray
Dale
 Doug
....................................................
NEW YEAR'S EVE
 
COLD  CHAMPAGNE for  $10 a bottle
Is available from the VFW at the Bar
BALLROOMwill be decorated with
Tablecloths and unscented candles
Beautiful party hats, party horns, napkins, balloons
Band will be dressed in GOLD and BLACK 
Jan will give away a "One of a Kind" collectible
NEW YEAR'S BABY at midnight.
 
 
A night to remember so join us
ALL PAID RESERVED TABLES CAN ARRIVE ANYTIME DURING THE NIGHT
AND YOUR TABLE WILL BE WAITING FOR YOU.
COME BRING IN THE NEW YEAR WITH US.
This will be our 3rd Archer Band New Year's Eve at Kelly Ingram VFW
Email  janshackelford@dollsbyjanshackelford.com if you need more
information or more seats reserved
 
PLEASE FORWARD TO ANY DANCERS
YOU THINK MIGHT BE INTERESTED
 
* BALLROOM  * SWING * WALTZ * TWIST * TANGO * POLKA * CHA CHA * JITTERBUG * OLDIES
* ROCK 'N ROLL * MOTOWN
 
..........................................................
 
DANCE WITH US EVER SATURDAY NIGHT
 
$7
8:00-Midnight
 
Kelly Ingram VFW Post 668
 
Kelly Ingram VFW Post 668 
1801-11th Avenue North
Birmingham 35234
By Civic Center, 252-2696
 
Low priced cash bar.  No checks or credit cards. 
No BYOB.  Popcorn from bar
 
NO SMOKING IN BUILDING
NO DRINKS FROM OUTSIDE
 
Many men and women to dance with
Please ask others to dance
Everyone there would rather be dancing
___________________________________________________________
Contact : Jan Archer Shackelford  205-410-4804
 
From I-59/I-20, take 22nd Street exit in downtown    
Birmingham and turn south onto 22nd Street. 
1 block later, turn right onto 8th Avenue North. 
Drive 4 blocks and turn right onto 18th Street.
Drive 3 blocks and turn right onto 11th Avenue North. 
Go in front of VFW and turn right into their parking lot. 
 Additional parking along 18th Street North. 
Enter through back door of VFW from parking lot.
 
You can also get on 18th Street South or North at any street from
11th Avenue South in Five Points South and drive through downtown
to 11th Avenue North, and turn right to go in front of the VFW.
 
Or get on 11th Avenue North at any point and drive to the VFW between
18th Street and 19th Street.  Fenced in paved parking lot.
Use rear entrance or front entrance of building.
______________________________
 
  
 
If you are a Veteran of a Foreign War  
Please consider joining the VFW 
It is a great organization to belong to 
And only $30 a year for membership
__________________________________
BAND IS AVAILABLE FOR
PRIVATE ENGAGEMENTS/ COMPANY PARTIES/ REUNIONS/
HOLIDAY PARTIES/ WEDDINGS