ANT & GRASSHOPPER AGAIN

THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER 3.0

 

THE OLD VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away..
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.  The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

THE OBAMA VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.
CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Big Bird, Elmo the pederast, and Kermit the Frog appear on Sesame Street with the grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, “It’s Not Easy Being Green.”
SEIU, MoveOn.org, and Occupy (whatever) stage a demonstration in front of the ant’s house where the news stations film the group singing, ”Down with the 1%!” Rev. Jesse Jackson damns the ant and asks God to bring forth pain and suffering to the grasshopper.
Obama condemns the ant and blames President George W. Bush and wealthy Americans for the grasshopper’s plight. Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate 100% tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share. The EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the IRS in the name of Obamacare and given to the grasshopper.
The ant tries to resist. But armed soldiers come to his door to arrest the ant without charge or trial, in the name of a law passed by both houses of Congress and signed by Obama (National Defense Authorization Act).
Thankfully, being very very small, the ant eludes his captors by hiding under a dry leaf.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant’s food while the government house that he is in, which, as you can recall, just happens to be the ant’s old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn’t maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.
A month later, the grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the now-ramshackled, once prosperous and once peaceful, neighborhood.
The entire Nation collapses taking the rest of the free world with it.
MORAL OF THE STORY:  As America voted on Nov. 6, 2012, so shall America reap.